There is a song titled When October goes, written by Johnny Mercer. The song talks about the passing of October, kids running in the evening light, watching planes go overhead and thinking of the fun that he had when he was one of them. When October goes his same dream appears and he thinks of all the happy years, then he turns his head to hide the helpless tears. Ok I know it is sappy but I am feeling the sadness of December and all of 2008 leaving. I don't want to forget things that happened this year, the good and the bad. Sometimes I don't want change, I don't want to move on. I know it is silly, but this holiday season I feel like a young child again. I loved the anticipation of thanksgiving. I loved having a excuse to eat food I don't usually get to eat. I loved having a reason to get together with the family. I think my favorite part comes when it is time to put up the tree. Even as a little girl I was the first one to start nagging my parents about the Christmas tree. I still haven't changed, except now I can just start setting things up and my husband has no choice but to follow behind helping. Anyway I am feeling the sadness of the passing of 2008. When I was little I was sad because I had nothing to look forward to after Christmas. I am trying not to feel that way now, but this year I am leaving behind the birth of my first baby girl. The birth of my last child. The passing of my mother. I know I still have memories but I am afraid of them fading. Will I remember how little Bella was? Will I remember all the stories of my mom? Will I be able to teach Bella how to make bread like my mom? What if I mess up who will help me? I already feel like I am forgetting my moms voice, her smile,even though I think of her daily.How can I help my kids remember my memories? I am sorry for carrying on, but an new year is coming and December is going.
3 comments:
Nice thoughts, Little Sister. I hate to be the one who breaks you the news, but your memory is indeed slipping - I don't think you'll remember much about any of these things, enjoy them while you have them. ;)'
Seriously though, be good to your husband, he's a great guy, (literally) and you need to be careful not to take him for granted. Love you lots! Look forward to the new year - you have a lot to look forward to!
Hey Jill! I just love you! I think it's wonderful you have fond memories of 2008 (me, too) and I appreciate your words of contemplation. You are so good at telling your children stories and I know they love to hear them. Now about 2009...How about in 2009 we relive the 2006 Ladies Talent Show (you as Barbara Streissand and Jana as Neil Diamond) or better yet - do a fun skit. That talent show was priceless! There's only a few of us left to remember that. It's time to make history again! 2009 is going to be a great year, my friend. I can feel it in my bones, not just for me, but for you, too. Talk to you soon! Hay
Dearest sweetest Jill. Yes 2008 is officially gone. With memories just remember what a GOOD mom you are not BAD mom. I mom always remember the areas she messed up in as do I and we need to remember the things we do that are right and good. I love you.
HJ
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